Weekend to Remember- Day 2 Session 6

14 Jun

Session Six

Main Theme: How couples resolve conflict reflects the state of their oneness.

Overview: What causes conflict, and how can you deal with it in a way that honors God, and honors your marriage.

Food for Thought:
1. Conflict happens in ALL marriages
2. The goal of marriage is not to be conflict free, but to handle correctly WHEN it happens
3. Healthy conflict resolution occurs when couples are willing to seek and grant forgiveness

Where does conflict come from?

Conflict occurs when our desires are not fulfilled, or when we don’t get what we want.

1. Our “rights” have been violated
2. Our expectations are not met
3. When we get hurt

Loving Confrontation

Before you confront the offender, examine the offense

1. Does the offense require confrontation? Proverbs 19:11

2. What part did you contribute to the conflict?

3. Examine your heart- Are you trying to: Retaliate, Restore, Punish, or Pursue Peace?

Your mate is NOT your enemy!!

Lovingly Confront: Eph. 4:15

1. Speak the truth in LOVE Eph. 4:29

2. Approach with care- Is the timing right? Is the focus right?

3. Choose your words carefully- Confront with humility, Speak the Truth in LOVE

4. Your goal should be to restore oneness. Gal. 6:1

Resolving Conflict Requires Forgiveness

The Bible says that we are ALL responsible to God to seek and grant forgiveness

The offender needs to seek forgiveness. Eph. 4:32

1. Admit to God and to yourself that you were wrong- Be specific, accept responsibility for the consequences, and consider and be willing to address the desires and attitudes that may have led to the offense.

2. Humbly seek forgiveness

I was wrong for saying ________, I am sorry that I ______ etc. Be specific in your asking of forgiveness!

3. The offended spouse NEEDS to grant forgiveness.

True Forgiveness is NOT:

* Pretending something did not happen

* Conditional

* Forgetting

* An automatic cure

Granting Forgiveness IS:

* A choice to set your spouse free from the debt of their offense

* An attitude of letting go of resentment and vengeance

* The first step towards rebuilding trust

* An act of obedience to God

***I did skip a couple of the sessions. They would be too hard to blog without all the stories, video clips, and interaction with the speaker and the audience.

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